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Drop into the museum briefly, then take a number 11 bus towards Canterbury.

Quickly pick up today's newspaper from the WHSmith, then head back to the cathedral and say "Look! I've found your lost Contra Posaune C# pipe!"

They reply that it looks particularly well fed, then take it from you and restore it (with great difficulty). You walk to Canterbury East station and take a train to...

..London Victoria. Then you pick up an Eastbound District line service, and travel as far as...

... Shoeburyness. Confused, you realise you have gone back in time to ...

...1914. Worried, you turn right around and get on a train back to Earl's Court, where you pick up an Outer Circle train to...

...Kensington Olympia. After all, I guess more trains ran between these two stations in 1914.

You notice that the station clock says 13:00 in the year 2013 - an S7 (T753) enters the station was a training run to Plaistow. You take the train as far as St. James's Park where...

... dammit, you're back in 2014 again. Luckily, your net time travel has dropped you off 2 hours earlier than you started. Except on the westbound platform is a train to Windsor and Eton Central... what is going on?

You realise that being at Kensington Olympia in 2013 was a dream, you wake up (again!) in 1934 at Osterley and Spring Grove station when something rounds the corner heading eastbound...

... of course, it's the last Standard Stock to call at the station, ever. You get on and head up to Boston Manor for Hanwell, soon (as in the next day) to become Boston Manor.

Then after a quick stroll down to the River Brent...

... you scream, because you've just time-travelled to 1966, and are now directly underneath the M4.

You head to Wembley Stadium and watch England win the only World Cup they'll ever win

And merrily stroll to Wembley Park station...