A Story from The Tube ...

[GuyBarry]

It was really quite cHILLING. DON had a habit of turning up exactly when he was needed.

[RobbieM]

He really was a criminal guRU. "I SLIPped up once, just once, and got arrested", he said.

[GuyBarry]

It was organized crime on quite an extraordinary sCALE. DON, IAN (ROAD crew) and many of the other prisoners were involved.

[The Orange One]

How about a version where you have to do one station each in order (for example down the Jubilee, or following Andi's 2009 World Record route which is now public knowledge)

But despite his precautions, Don still let one of them (of course on a drugs HIGH) BURY ANDI SLINGTON beside the STAM FORD (BROOKlyn).

[RobbieM]

They were going for several crimes - probably ten in a row; a crime 'decathLON'. DON BRIDGEd any gaps in communication in an interesting way...

[GuyBarry]

How about a version where you have to do one station each in order (for example down the Jubilee, or following Andi's 2009 World Record route which is now public knowledge)

[I'm finding it difficult enough telling a coherent story just picking out random stations!]

... because, equipped with a WIMBLE, DON had a secret plan to escape.

[P.S. Where's the "Stam Ford" in Brooklyn then?]

[RobbieM]

• [P.S. Where's the "Stam Ford" in Brooklyn then?]

  I was wondering that...

[/i]
This wasn't just any ordinary WIMBLE. DON PARKed himself by the prison wall, and put his secret plan to work...

[GuyBarry]

Boring out from the SOUTH, WIMBLE DON (as he was known by a few trusted associates) managed to penetrate the walls of the prison.

[hopeful traveller]

[Post censored owing to forum regulations]

[RobbieM]

There he got into the getaway car, driven by an accomplice of Don's.
"So,", said the accomplice, "where are we going, guRU?"
"ISLIP. GARDENS are nice in Oxfordshire at this time of year."

[hopeful traveller]

I was thinking of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glory_hole_(sexual_slang) - but it works.

Then things got romantic on the long car journey between Don and his accomplice, Ken.

"Will you marry me?"
"Yeah, but--"
"SIC.... KEN?"
"HAMilton. I'm in love with Hamilton."

That's ICKENHAM by the way, the capitalisation doesn't make it clear.

[GuyBarry]

"Well, that's a surprise, KEN. SAL GREEN says she's in love with you."

[hopeful traveller]

"No, Hamilton calls himself Sal Green."
"WHAT!?"

A little later....

"So, do you like Eurovision?"
"Yes, I love France 2009."
"What, "La Noche Es Para MÍ"?"
" 'LE END' est trés super !"
"Don't you mean 'le fin'?"
"Erm... oui."
"And wasn't it Spain 2009?"
"Erm.... si. El final es muy bueno."

They arrived in Islip and were immediately arrested on breaking out of prison. One of the members of the jury was, shockingly, WES TACTON. The court accused Don of killing the former Cannabis Alliance leader with a WES TH' ARROW, but the case was thrown out after it was told that it was an RTHH arrow. The lovebirds Don and Ken went to Wick, where...

[GuyBarry]

They arrived in Islip and were immediately arrested on breaking out of prison. One of the members of the jury was, shockingly, WES TACTON. The court accused Don of killing the former Cannabis Alliance leader with a WES TH' ARROW, but the case was thrown out after it was told that it was an RTHH arrow. The lovebirds Don and Ken went to Wick, where...

[This doesn't make an awful lot of sense, for various reasons:
(1) Ken hadn't broken out of prison - he was the driver of the getaway car.
(2) Once they caught Don they'd send him straight back to prison - he wouldn't stand trial all over again.
(3) It wasn't Don who murdered the Cannabis Alliance leader - it was the cannibal, who's already serving a sentence for it!
Don't think much of "WES TH' ARROW" either, but anyway...]

After they'd been there a few days, Don said "Why did we come all the way up to the north of Scotland? I was happier in the SOUTH, KEN. TONs happier."

[The Orange One]

"But I've got a job here," said KEN SINGTON. "OLYMPIA competition's starting pretty soon, and I need to ensuRE GENTS PARKing. Feel free to go to back to your SOUTH WIMBLE, DON. We have MOR DEN (apologies, can't resist) enough people here."

(Remember John Collier and the singing competition?)